Interesting bit of information. I shall commit it to memory. You may be disappointed, but it seems like a blessing to me. Undoubtedly you were saved some words that you may have found difficult to forget.
We've-- talked about things. I confessed to sneaking into his dream. He handled it surprisingly well? We have something that *isn't* a date happening on Friday. What it is, I guess, is being together in private for only the second time in our friendship. I'd like something to happen, I think. I don't know for certain it will. But in case something does, I'd rather take this opportunity to be with you now, if only for an evening, before I betray him like I did Jack. Thace, at least, doesn't deserve it
I plan to ask Hades his opinion of him, so I don't walk into another situation like with Jack. Hades is better at telling if men are any good than I am. I get very stupid when I'm in love.
(I'm forever glad that you made Hades and I really talk. His advice and thoughts have been invaluable to me, as have yours. I don't think I'd have had the strength to believe Armin if you hadn't helped me so much.)
I'm hardly a bad judge of character either. Yet it sounds as if you want to take a pass at me so that you perhaps won't have any regrets when you pursue Thace, is that it?
Come now, wouldn't you prefer to charge ahead bravely at that which awaits you? I have my own designs as well, and I'd hate to make your new friend seem inadequate in comparison.
I wasn't sure if it's fair to ask you about the man I would like to pursue when you know that if you tell me not to go after him, I'll definitely be available for future recreation together and if you tell me to go after him and it works that there's every chance he'll want fidelity.
But if you have any further thoughts on that subject of Thace, do be my guest. *Do* you think I'll be happier than I was with Jack in the end?
It depends. How well do you know his mind? Would he commit the sort of atrocity that you wouldn't forgive?
Besides that, I can see a certain pattern forming. I suspect that you might not be as monogamous as your surrounding culture demands. ...Are you even from a monogamous species? Is he? Is this what you want?
I really don't think so, but then I didn't think Jack could either and we both saw how wrong I was. I *do* think he's a much better man than Jack could ever be--but we also know I am *very* stupid when I'm in love, so I don't think my personal assessments are worth much in this case.
And no. No, I'm *not* naturally monogamous, at least when it comes to *sex*. Even in a happy relationship, my eye will stray from time to time. I think I'm inclined to only be *in love* with only one person, but that doesn't prevent me from *lusting* after others. Far from it. But then love and sex are two separate things for me.
As for humans in general... we probably aren't, considering how our closest relatives from a biological standpoint are. And I have no idea if Galra are. But *just in case* I'd like to have my evening with you while I can. If it turns out Galra are non-monogamous, then we'll see about repeats or a threesome.
My, my. You have quite the bit of homework ahead of you, Steven. You enjoy talking about yourself so much that you neglected to gather that sort of information with questions.
In either case, I suspect that I will be tied down rather soon. As I said, I have plans of my own.
Yes, I know, I *know*. It's rather terrible of me, but I didn't even admit I wanted him until an hour ago, so asking those questions before that... might have given the game away.
I'll work better on asking those questions come Friday.
... also dare I ask what plans? Or is it just trying to get Dirk and Hades to agree to a threesome?
It is somewhat less short-lived than what a threesome implies...
Don't play games with men if they're smarter than you are. It's never worth the trouble. Sate my curiosities. He may be a good man, but is he a smart one as well?
He is. Clever, with a good mind for strategy. And I've already had a bit of a scolding for playing with his heart, which I well deserved--and yet, he still wants me. Which is surprising. I've shown him myself at my most selfish and manipulative and he still wants me.
We. Ah. Had a long overdue talk about feelings before I texted you. I think we're on the same page.
*Oh*. Shooting straight for a menage a trois, then. Good luck.
And yes. I *know*. The older I get, the more I'm willing to admit what a fool I am about men. I can be reasonably clever about anything else, but when a man turns my head, I start to lose it. When my heart gets involved, I become very stupid indeed.
[The replies after come one at a time. He's definitely putting some thought into them.]
*Listen* if someone tells me that there's something wrong with how he's acting. I didn't listen to Maya or Angel about Jack--I didn't listen to *Lydia* and she's one of my best friends--and that definitely came back to bite me in the ass.
Check myself for dependency--both emotional and economical. I don't ever want to feel as trapped as I did that last month with Jack.
(Relatedly: make sure he's doing the same. I don't want to trap him. I don't want to *be* someone like Jack for him. He's had affairs and fuckbuddies before as a soldier in the Galra space navy, but I don't think he's ever had a proper relationship before. I want to be good for him.)
And tell him straight out that I *will* be attracted to people outside him and that it doesn't mean I care for him any less or want to leave him or cheat on him--it just means I have a high sex drive and men are attractive. Given that the last time we saw each other in person was me cheating on Jack with him, this might be a delicate needle to thread, but hopefully I will be up for it.
And most of all... I can't ever be anyone *but* myself, with all that implies, around him. More than anything, I have to be *honest* with him from this moment forward. I got into this by deceiving him, by sneaking into his dream and letting him think his mind had conjured me up. He forgave me for reasons that I will never understand, other than he's spent most of this autumn being quietly in love with me and not saying a thing.
With Liam, I tried to present myself as an entirely different person. With Jack, I lied by omission all the time. I can't, I won't, do that with Thace.
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What of your new friend? Thace, correct?
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I plan to ask Hades his opinion of him, so I don't walk into another situation like with Jack. Hades is better at telling if men are any good than I am. I get very stupid when I'm in love.
(I'm forever glad that you made Hades and I really talk. His advice and thoughts have been invaluable to me, as have yours. I don't think I'd have had the strength to believe Armin if you hadn't helped me so much.)
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Come now, wouldn't you prefer to charge ahead bravely at that which awaits you? I have my own designs as well, and I'd hate to make your new friend seem inadequate in comparison.
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But if you have any further thoughts on that subject of Thace, do be my guest. *Do* you think I'll be happier than I was with Jack in the end?
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Besides that, I can see a certain pattern forming. I suspect that you might not be as monogamous as your surrounding culture demands. ...Are you even from a monogamous species? Is he? Is this what you want?
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And no. No, I'm *not* naturally monogamous, at least when it comes to *sex*. Even in a happy relationship, my eye will stray from time to time. I think I'm inclined to only be *in love* with only one person, but that doesn't prevent me from *lusting* after others. Far from it. But then love and sex are two separate things for me.
As for humans in general... we probably aren't, considering how our closest relatives from a biological standpoint are. And I have no idea if Galra are. But *just in case* I'd like to have my evening with you while I can. If it turns out Galra are non-monogamous, then we'll see about repeats or a threesome.
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In either case, I suspect that I will be tied down rather soon. As I said, I have plans of my own.
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I'll work better on asking those questions come Friday.
... also dare I ask what plans? Or is it just trying to get Dirk and Hades to agree to a threesome?
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Don't play games with men if they're smarter than you are. It's never worth the trouble. Sate my curiosities. He may be a good man, but is he a smart one as well?
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We. Ah. Had a long overdue talk about feelings before I texted you. I think we're on the same page.
(Also if it's not that, then what?)
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Moving right to the parenthetical, I happen to think that there's quite enough room in their lives, even outside of the bedroom, for one more man.
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And yes. I *know*. The older I get, the more I'm willing to admit what a fool I am about men. I can be reasonably clever about anything else, but when a man turns my head, I start to lose it. When my heart gets involved, I become very stupid indeed.
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Indeed. I should hope there is still brain enough left between your ears to learn from your mistakes. What will you do differently this time?
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[The replies after come one at a time. He's definitely putting some thought into them.]
*Listen* if someone tells me that there's something wrong with how he's acting. I didn't listen to Maya or Angel about Jack--I didn't listen to *Lydia* and she's one of my best friends--and that definitely came back to bite me in the ass.
Check myself for dependency--both emotional and economical. I don't ever want to feel as trapped as I did that last month with Jack.
(Relatedly: make sure he's doing the same. I don't want to trap him. I don't want to *be* someone like Jack for him. He's had affairs and fuckbuddies before as a soldier in the Galra space navy, but I don't think he's ever had a proper relationship before. I want to be good for him.)
And tell him straight out that I *will* be attracted to people outside him and that it doesn't mean I care for him any less or want to leave him or cheat on him--it just means I have a high sex drive and men are attractive. Given that the last time we saw each other in person was me cheating on Jack with him, this might be a delicate needle to thread, but hopefully I will be up for it.
And most of all... I can't ever be anyone *but* myself, with all that implies, around him. More than anything, I have to be *honest* with him from this moment forward. I got into this by deceiving him, by sneaking into his dream and letting him think his mind had conjured me up. He forgave me for reasons that I will never understand, other than he's spent most of this autumn being quietly in love with me and not saying a thing.
With Liam, I tried to present myself as an entirely different person. With Jack, I lied by omission all the time. I can't, I won't, do that with Thace.