In the interest of full disclosure: Dirk has been hefted in similar fashion before. Not often, no, but it's happened both in and out of the ringt. Until this precise moment, it has also been an indignity inflicted by only one infmaously-exuberant man: Jake English.

The association is realised with equal parts shock, mortification, and horror. And the fact that Hythlodaeus has also chosen to seize him by the waist of his pants is a little extra embarrassing, especially in combination with the disparity in physical scale. But there are no counters to this that aren't Strife-levels of damaging and/or painful to their target, and for all of his misgivings and mistrust, Dirk does not actually want to break Hythlodaeus' nose or threaten to rip out a fistful of long, white hair. Which is, by the way, spilling over Dirk's face, beneath his shades and in his mouth.

But Dirk is honestly not sure what to do, except hope this is over with quickly.